This is the 2nd of 9 extracts from The Free, an anarcha feminist Social Revolution in the Collapse of capitalism. E-book out now as a Free Download.
The Free page 371.. mock interview at Ultimatum rally
a Zeitgeist inspired satire, set at the huge demo against the Nato style Pacifist Invasion Force.
-‘Ladies and Laddies.. Goodies and Baddies!.. I give you!.. Exclusively here today!.. The right Horrible!.. GENERAL.. TOOTSY.. COOPERS!.. ‘-
Curiosity and the excellent sound system gradually won out, shushing the hubbub of the gigantic protest meeting.
-‘General. Is it true what they’re saying? Shut up back there and listen now.. General Tootsy, is it true that civilian casualties aren’t counted? Aren’t we human beings as well?’-
-‘Now listen you all here. There’s good and bad all over. I reckon it’s your viewers who are racists.’-
-‘But would any decent person join the army of the Evil Empire?’-
-‘Our only goal is to spread happiness, prosperity and Our Western Values around the globe.’-
-‘Lovely, er General. Do you know that our young CLAN friends here have united to accuse you of collaborating in the murder of five hundred million people?’-
-‘Now that’s what we call poppycock, son!’
A group of Clan Eagles had appeared, swooping and looping over the vast crowd, disregarding safety precautions, and dividing attention from Tootsy’s fake interview.
-‘It’s a detailed report. Endorsed by world famous historians and economists.’-
-‘Is there a person still alive. Remembers nineteen forty five’-
-‘They say you put gangsters and mercenaries in power in dozens of countries. Printed up a lot of dollars and lent it to them.’-
-‘That was the banks..’-
-‘You won the war sir, many thanks. So then you could control the banks.’-
-‘This report says these countries still can’t pay back even the ever expanding interest on their dubious debts.’-
-‘Well, they borrowed the money.’-
-‘General Tootsy Coopers, are you aware that more than twenty five thousand people die every day in these same countries of hunger, main cause? Fifteen thousand of them children? Every day Tootsy.’-
-‘Oh come on man, gimme a break.’-
-‘Did you know it’s difficult to die of hunger, General?’-
-‘To die of hunger, main cause, usually takes over two years of degrading, miserable, painful, soul destroying suffering. Did you know that?’-
-‘Well actually I haven’t tried it recently. Ha ha.’-
-‘Which, according to the calculation of our CLAN friends, adds up to well over a thousand million years of intense human suffering you boys are responsible for.’-
-‘I’m glad you say ‘you boys’, I’m not the only general who.. .’-
-‘Did you read that you could stop this horror with just a few days a year off your military budget?’-
-‘That’s a job for charities. A lot of wonderful folks back home are.. ‘-
-‘But you couldn’t stop it could you. You couldn’t. You wouldn’t dream of stopping it. Because they wouldn’t obey and pay anymore, would they?’-
-‘That’s wrong as well..’-
-‘If you abolished their debt they wouldn’t be so keen to sign away anything they got, or might ever get, for a new line of credit. Would they?’-
-‘Monetary discipline does play a fundamental part in the maintenance of law and order.’-
-‘And that’s what you’re doing here isn’t it? Showing the rest that nobody can escape your money system.’-
-‘I’m sorry boy but the law is the law. We can’t just make an exception for you wonderful folks.’-
-‘If you won’t play they’ll get you back. They got a million in Iraq.’-
-‘Hey quit with the one liners will ya.’-
-‘Oh by the way General Tootsy, have you ever heard of Shari Paba?’-
-‘Maybe so. Is she a singer?’-
-‘Well, yes, she was a singer. Um, Shari was one of the fifteen thousand children you killed last Wednesday.’-
-‘I’m sorry I was golfing on Wednesday.’
Tootsy had raised his arms and slowly turned, his profile glinting on the giant screen.
Acknowledging massive imaginary applause. Deigning to share slight dignified bows.
-‘They chose her as their symbol because an aid worker knew her and included a photo and a few lines in her blog.’-
-‘That’s really not my problem You can’t just.. ‘-
-‘Wednesday 25th. Shari Paba. Aged about four. A few days dead.
Mother died last year. Dehydration. Diarrhea, stank.
Old aunty can’t carry water, men don’t help much.
Big black eyes. Gifted singer.’
That’s what she wrote, you wanna see the photo? Can we just put Shari’s photo on the big screen please.’-
-‘Awwww.’- Came a murmur from the multitude. Shari had been a sweet looking kid.
-‘Okay we need to imagine this girl Shari, but fifteen thousand times over. Dying after long disgraceful suffering, every single day for the last seventy years. So that these criminals can keep their power and wasteful lifestyle…got it?..’-
-‘You really can’t accuse us, how dare you.. ‘
-‘It’s the CLANs accusing Sir, not me. They’re organizing a new Ultimatum. Worldwide voting next Saturday. Just put CLAN Ultimatum in a search engine. Next Saturday will be that vote folks..’-
-‘More mindless violence from those naked perverts and degenerates!’- Tootsy was mock scandalized.
-‘The leading suggestion as of now is Violent Pacifism. They want to destroy the monetary system. Shut down CO2 power stations and industry. Abolish debt. Introduce the Peace and Plenty system we’re working on over here.’-
-‘That’s just superstition. Hocus Pocus Bunkum, you’ll see.’-
-‘Thank you General for your time. Now…Three Two One Disappear!’-
The trumpets hooted and blared.
And the false General Tootsy Coopers vanished in a puff of pink smoke.
Through a trapdoor in the stage, we supposed.
Only to reappear in another cloud, waving his arms and coughing, amid general clapping and jeers. He was clapping himself, relieved as he’d feared that as a comedian we wouldn’t understand a serious message.
Everyone had understood, now if only the real General would appear.
To check out the concepts behind this scene you can check the references HERE, … fascism, un-schooling. CLANs, gay, etc … and click to the links for various books in the Anarchist Library.
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